Hold on to your hats, everyone. Especially if you know me. Especially if you are my mom or dad.
I am seriously considering having this baby without an epidural.
I know. This is coming from the girl who wanted the anesthesiologist to meet me IN the parking lot with needle in hand with my first child. Heck, this is coming from the girl who had a discussion with my husband (serious on my part, incredulous on his) before my oldest's birth about scheduling a c-section because I was so afraid of the pain and my actual ability to push a baby out that I thought having him cut out of me would be better.
With Ethan, my labor was 9 hours total. I was so numb from the epidural I couldn't feel anything. His heart rate got so low that they gave me oxygen. When he was born he was blue (and he had the umbilical cord wrapped around his neck). Christian said he didn't respond to anything and didn't start crying for quite a few seconds. His Apgar was a 6. It was a pretty scary situation.
With Aidan, my labor (from start to finish) was 3 hours. I got an epidural again, but it was light enough that I could still feel my legs. I knew when to push, he was red and crying like mad when he was born, and overall it was a great experience. I wondered at that time whether not having an epidural would have made the labor even faster.
When That Girl posted her son's birth story last week, I read it with wonder. She didn't have an epidural, and she survived. Not only did she survive, but her labor was quick and she feels fantastic. It really got me thinking. And talking. With my psychologist husband, who is more than willing to discuss these things with me, talk out my feelings, and help me arrive to the decision I want to make. We have talked a lot about pain, and what is "normal," and the psychology behind all of my feelings for hours and hours this week. I still haven't ruled out an epidural, but I am realizing I have only about 8-10 weeks left to make this decision.
If anyone has any positive natural birth stories, please feel free to send them my way. (I don't need the negative ones; I have already heard plenty of those.)
One last question. I know this is kind of a charged discussion topic for some people - whether to have an epidural or not. But I don't get why? In my opinion, it's the woman's decision and no one should judge her for making that decision. It's the same with breastfeeding in my opinion. Whether you do or whether you don't - to each her own. Do you agree, or do you have STRONG feelings one way or the other (regarding epidurals, not breastfeeding. At least not in this blog post.)? Why?
77 people wanted to leave a comment:
I really don't care about what other women choose to do.
For me, I will have an epidural. I don't see any reason to endure pain like that if I don't have to.
I had an epidural with Ev (we were in Provo) and I loved the freedom from the pain I had been crying through before I got it. My recovery was not as nice. I didn't feel particularly well after it. My next three were drugless, not by choice, you may remember, but I always felt VERY good after the birth. I just hate the before the birth part. A lot.(oops, you said positive stuff, but I suppose you already know that it hurts.)
I think people should DO WHAT THEY WANT! I must say, though that I wondered why people would choose to go through all the pain and sickness of it. Now that I've done it, though, I think it's sort of amazing how we're made and that something so IMPOSSIBLE can happen. And you come out feeling great.
Erin, you should read Hypnobirthing the Mongon Method. I swore I would always have an epidural, but after reading this I'm not so sure anymore. I have wondered the same thing. I will be interested to see what you decide.
I didn't have a choice because all of my kids were born via c-section, however, I'm pretty sure that I would have opted for the epidural if I'd had them the regular way.
I don't have an opinion on whether it's better to have an epidural or not. It so much depends on how fast or slow the labor goes and how much emotional baggage the woman has tied up in giving birth a certain way.
I saw a comedian a few months ago whose wife was getting ready to deliver their first child, and everyone was telling them to do it at home with no pain meds since women have been giving birth "naturally" for ages. This guy joked that those women, in the throes of labor, were dreaming of a magical place that they could give birth without pain! ha!
That said, my personal choice was no epidural. I labored for almost 12 hours with my daughter before things went horribly wrong, and I had to have a section, BUT it had nothing to do with my not having pain meds.
It was hard and painful, but I found such satisfaction with being totally present for the whole process- I really wanted to feel the whole thing, and I was so proud for doing it as long as I did. Not every woman feels that way about birth, and that is totally fine. I was asked if I wanted to do a VBAC with my second child, and I turned it down in lieu of a scheduled c-section. Sometimes our view of what will make an ideal birth experience changes over time.
All that matters is a healthy baby and a healthy mom, and whatever it takes to get there is what you need to do.
I had an epidural with all 3. I also had toxemia with all 3 and crazy weird labors and medicationd that made me vomit with each contraction. I don't think I could have done it without one. If my pregnancies were normal and I had no complications--I probably would have tried to go without.
I did one birth with an epidural during labor that stopped working before delivery. (NOT good.) Another birth with no epidural during labor, but got one in time for delivery. (That was better.) And third birth with an epidural that worked for the whole thing. (much better). But my third birth might have been easier than the first two just because it was a third, so it's hard to say. It's totally up to the parents; it's not a moral issue, it's a personal preference issue. I marvel at those who do it differently than I did, but don't judge them or myself. We just do what works for us. Good luck!
Sorry for hogging the comments, but I have a good friend who had all of her children using hypno birthing. WOW is all I can say. She had the most beautiful births with all four of her children. She looked completely refreshed and calm the whole time. Quiet, controlled, and pain free (according to her). Something to look into if you're considering doing it without an epidural.
I say do what you feel is best for you...i'm a HUGE wimp when it comes to pain so i did opt for an epidural with my first but then i labored for so long i had to have an emergency c-section and then with my other 2 i had to have c-sections. i think its great that you are thinking about doing it natural...maybe take a lamaz(sp?) class at the hospital, i hear they are great for those that wish to do things natural, good luck!
I had an epidural with both of mine. My first labor was much longer, making recovery a little tougher. With my son, I was in hysterics when the nurses told me there might not be time for one- it all happened pretty fast, and I barely got it in time to push. I was able to relax once the intense pain was gone, and I enjoyed his birth and recovered quickly after.
I am in the 'to each their own' club too. But I guess I just don't get not taking advantage of modern medicine, but that's me.
It bugs me when women say "other women have given birth for centuries without epidurals so why do it now when it can be empowering to go without?" because 1) people went for centuries without novocain during dental work. How empowering would they think it is to get a root canal or tooth pulled without the glorious pain medicine in 2010? 2) it's a slam to women who choose to have pain medicine during childbirth: I am empowered. you are a wimp.
I'm so thankful I had an epidural with #1. My labor was 74 hours, and YES, it was all "real" labor. I couldn't feel a thing when I was pushing, so it was very hard, but I'm so thankful for that epidural.
With my 2nd, I had an epidural again, a few hours after my water broke, before I had any kind of painful contraction. And I paid for it. I had some freaky reaction that was *horrible*. I had a horrible itch all over my body and nothing they gave me could get it away. They said it wasn't uncommon and would go away when the epidural came out. It didn't go away for about 8 hours after the epidural came out, and not to be too grody, but I totally gouged myself (complete with blisters and big scars still 2 years later!) from itching so hard when I was numb.
If I ever had another birth experience (I won't) I would skip the epidural. I'm scared of the pain. Very nervous. But I'm more scared of the itching coming back - it was that bad. And I figure I could do anything for 10 hours, right?
If you want to do it - DO IT!
Have you rented "The Business of Being Born?" Totally biased, but still interesting. Might make you want a home birth on top of the natural birth.
Okay, this is going to be long. I really wish I could tell you this in person because it would be so much easier. Oh well. Here goes:
I have 4 children. I had an epidural with my first delivery and nothing with the last 3.
I went into my first labor not wanting to have any type of pain meds. My labor was extremely fast and intense and I kind of freaked out. I was prepared for a long, slow process and not one that was over in about 6 hours. So, I got an epidural. I can't say that I hated it totally, but I didn't love it either. The only thing I can say I liked about it was that I didn't feel the episiotomy. ☺ I hated feeling like I had no control. I didn't know when to push. I had to be told to do it. I hated being hoisted from one bed to another after delivery. I hated feeling like the lower half of my body had been beaten with a bat after it wore off. I guess what it ulitmately boils down too is that I felt out of control. I'm a control freak and that DID NOT suit my personality. I decided that I would never have one again.
I went into my second labor prepared to be a speedster. I knew that it could be fast and intense and I was ready for it. I was better prepared to deal with the pain and it was just like the first. Over and done with before I knew it and I made it through without an epidural. Yes it hurt and yes it was hard. But it wasn't so painful that I felt as if I would die from it. Pushing was actually a relief. I was in control and I knew when to do it too. I don't think I can do an adequate job of telling you how very different I felt after. I was up and walking and using the bathroom on my own less than an hour after delivery. I didn't feel stiff, sore or swollen. The cramping after didn't seem so bad either. Oh yeah, and my baby nursed right away because he was wide awake and ready. My first was so sleepy from it, it made nursing horrendous. He just wouldn't wake up. As a result, I became engorged, got mastitis and had to be on antibiotics for 2 weeks.
You're right. Having an epidural, or not, is a very personal decision, but I highly recommend NOT having one. The difference in how you feel after will absolutely amaze you. You'll feel empowered and strong. It's totally possible for any woman to do it. Especially one who has given birth before and knows what to do. If you feel you can do it, you should.
See, this was long. Just like I said. It was probably very rambly too. I hope my nonsense was helpful to you. ☺
P.S. a friend of mine did hypno birthing with her 2nd baby and absolutely LOVED her experience with it. She now teaches it...check out her website for more info on her experience and what its all about...
http://www.birthrelaxed.com/
Baby #1: The whole labor was 12 hours. I had an epidural at 8cm (being my first time, the pushing thing freaked me out, and I got that epi last minute). It slowed the labor down and they had to give Pitocin, it slowed my heart-rate way down, and I had to get some other meds for that. So the need for meds snowballed. Then, my right leg stayed completely numb for 3 weeks after, and mostly numb for 6 weeks. Not such a great experience.
Baby #2: Wanted to go natural. Ended up being induced, but still opted for no pain meds. The painful part of labor lasted about 3 1/2hrs, and was crazy, horrible, and wonderful. I loved it afterwords, and felt super happy and womanly/empowered while I recovered.
Baby #3: Wanted to go natural again, but had prenatal depression. Made it to about 6cm, and after prayer and thoughtfulness, decided I wasn't emotionally up to toughing out the intensity of the end part. So, got an epidural, could still feel lots of pressure, and it went really well and was the right choice that time.
My advice: If you're feeling tough and determined, and give yourself to option to opt out, I say GO NATURAL! I felt this awesome sense of joining the women of our past who didn't have any other options. I felt empowered and strong and confident (afterwards - during, I felt a little insane).
If I have a 4th and don't have the yucky depression of #3, I'd try for natural again.
Good luck, either way!
For me, there wasn't much choice in getting an epidural (with the whole having twins thing, and giving birth in the OR, standard for twins).
It was nice that since I had an emergency c-section after pushing out baby A, I was already numb, and didn't have to feel the Dr. cutting me open. I have a friend who was not that lucky.
Plus I went hard and fast (4 hours from water breaking to babies out), and the contractions HURT.
So I loved my epidural. But I also promise not to incredulously question your sanity should you choose to not get one. I much prefer the to each her own.
I had my first two with the epidural and one without (only because the anesthesiologist didn't make it in time). It is hard but you are more aware of your body and what it is telling you. I felt the baby drop and knew when it was about time to deliver. (that didn't get the doc there any faster though.) It was also induced. Some say that that makes it harder because your contractions come faster and harder. My longest labor was 8 hours and I have shaved and hour off with each baby. I am hoping my next one with be only 5 hours! I am not going to have an epidural with the next one. I did it once and survived and can do it again!
Good luck in your decision. In the end you have to do what is right for you and your baby!
4 C-secs for me, so I have nothing for ya. But I guess I would probably have tried without if I had had a chance.
I think women should decide for themselves. I had 5 deliveries, 4 of which were easy. One I had pre-eclampsia with so that made everything tough. I had good epidurals though, I could feel my legs, etc. Two of them were too late and I delivered before they even got to take effect. Literally, the doc was taping the needle when I had to push really bad and the nurse came running in and I had the baby a few minutes later. Wasted a few hundred bucks, oh well!
One thing that bugs me is that people do make a big deal if you've gone natural or not. I heard one person tell another about someone who just had her baby and she said "she didn't have any drugs because she's a hero." And the other said that women just don't get it - there's no need for epidurals, etc. etc. and women are tougher than that.
I just thought that was a little closed minded.
It's personal and each way should be respected.
Good post!
Thanks for letting me take part!
I look in amazement at women who choose not to have an epidural. (In a good way - like wow, you're strong!) My first came so fast that there wasn't time for one, so I had her natural. (Like, the anesthesiologist was on his way when she decided to come!)
Anyway, having done it both ways, I'm choosing epidural this time around, but I think you're amazing to keep the options open.
I'd say recover time was probably a little faster without epidural, but not significantly. Although, I also had an episiotomy with both... So that might have skewed my recovery time.
Everyone laughs at me because I say I am too big of a wimp to have an epidural. I cannot stand the thought of someone sticking that big needle in my back. I have gone natural for both of my girls but I wouldn't do it any other way and hope to do it the same with any other children that I have. I have nothing against woman who have them. I actually think they are BRAVE. The needle sounds awful! I took Lamaze (sp?) type classes before I had Keira and they worked wonders. Knowing how to breathe when you are in massive amounts of pain is a good thing. So if you decide you even MIGHT want to go natural look into doing some type of class.
I had my 1st kiddo c-section due to a failed induction and epidural. With my 2nd kiddo, we wanted to go natural to avoid another c-section. And it totally worked, and she was a big baby. My 3rd kiddo was again natural. My 4th was a planned c-section due to an estimated fetal weight of over 10 pounds with a 16 inch head. And they were right on with his size. I have to say natural was painful but it was very impowering and the recovery was awesome. I did natural without any classes or stuff like that.
I have had 3 children. My first was without an epidural, my second and third, with an epidural. All 3 of my births are so incredibly different and each amazing in their own way. I will say this. If I knew my labor was going to be as short as you think yours will be, I personally would opt for a natural delivery. Here's why. My first delivery was the most spiritual experience of my entire life, so far. I felt in total control, so connected with my husband. He was my rock! I was so at peace and the room was filled with such an indescribable sweet spirit. I loved knowing what was going on with my body the entire time. I felt in total control. I did have a doula with me the entire time and I could have never done it without her. If you do decide to go natural, I would HIGHLY suggest hiring a doula. They are amazing and know exactly how to help a woman in labor and also, they taught my hubby certain techniques that helped me every step of the way. Now I know that some births can be like this WITH an epidural, so I am in no way knocking an epidural. Like I said, I've had 2 and they were fantastic! Having said that, I would sway towards natural. Good luck with your decision. I know you will make the right choice for you and your baby!
I have been having the same discussions with my hubby. I have been thinking about having a water birth. I have a mid-wife, not a doctor. I do NOT want an epidural unless I am dying of pain. I watched the documentary "The Business of Being Born" and it really opened my eyes to quite a few things. I agree that this is definitely a decision that every woman needs to make on her own but there are definitely pros and cons to both ways. I just kind of felt like putting my two cents in since it has been on our minds a lot lately too.
Hi! Just wanted to share my natural birth story with ya... it's VERY detailed (oversharing warning) so here's the link: http://ninjapanza.blogspot.com/search/label/birth%20story
I am SO GLAD I did it this way.
Doulas are great (if I do say so myself) even for people who chose a medicated birth route, but they are super helpful in the case of unmedicated births. Many OB nurses (and some doctors as well) haven't seen what unmedicated births look like and it sometimes freaks them out because of the sounds and effort that birthing babies can sometimes take. I have LOTS of unmedicated birth stories that I could share (my own and from the 30+ births that I've attended as a doula). Typing them one handed would make that difficult ;) SO if you want to talk, I would love to, give me a call:) Yes, I am a proud birth junkie! My google reader is filled with all things birth and baby blogs, maybe you'd like those links... Let me know. 4 of my 5 were unmedicated. #4 was the only intervention birth that required medication, #5 waterbirth VBAC at home and completely awesome :) Also, consider taking a childbirth class OUTSIDE of the hospital. A couple of books that come to mind to read are Birthing From Within and Hypnobirthing The Mongan Method, or Hypnobabies all of which have websites as well. Best wishes for whatever YOU choose.
Can't believe I forgot Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. Super awesome book with LOTS of natural childbirth stories. She also has a website www.inamay.com
I think it is just a personal choice. Either way is good.
I have 5 children - I had the first 4 naturally - no meds at all. I'm not gonna lie - IT HURT! But I did recover very fast - I never had to have an episiotomy (that makes a difference).
That said, my 5th and last little guy I had an epidural. I could feel my legs enough to push but guess what "my husband had no bruised arms this time - ha ha". It was SO EASY and I loved it - NO pain...Wow! I was little numb for an hour but it wore off quickly and I didn't have any type of side effect so it was good.
Personal decision, but I think if I would have had another I would have definately gone with another epidural.
4 C-Sections here, too, though I fought tooth and nail for a natural VBAC with #2. It wasn't in the cards, but I was nearly there when they discovered a complication that could have caused my death, as well as my daughter's.
I say go for it, if you feel strongly about it, or leave the option for epidural open if you're not quite sure. Yeah, I'm a lot of help. :)
PS Can I just tell you how delighted I am that you wrote "To each *her* own?" So many people use that wrong and it drives me batty. It's a pleasing surprise when someone gets it right. Self-professed grammar freak here. :)
I really don't care what other women choose to do. Everyone knows what is right for them. I just don't like being "judged" because I had epidurals and did not breastfeed very long.
In hindsight. My children's births were just fine and they all grew up to be healthy adults.
Do what you KNOW you should do FOR YOU and your family.
I don't feel strongly either way--it is completely up to the woman. I tried to go natural with #1. Got to 8 cm and just couldn't take it anymore. #3 and #4, however, the epidurals didn't work. I basically gave birth naturally, but still had to pay for the epidurals. It was painful, but definitely doable. I say go for it--if that's what you want.
I was going to get on here and tell you to talk to my cute friend Christa because she didn't have one with her last three and she loved it... but she already commented just like I knew she would. I think go into it saying that you don't want one and see how you are progressing and then if you want one ask for it. There is no harm in that I had an epidural with all 5 of mine. I wasn't going to with my first one because I thought I would tough it out but I got to a 5 and the pictocin was kicking my butt so I asked for one (I think my hubby was relieved).
I went into the other births wanting one but on my last one was born in and hour and a half. I progressed so fast that the epidural couldn't keep up and only one side was numb and I could feel the contractions on the right side of my body. I kind of freaked out telling my honey that I didn't want to go through "transition" but I just didn't realize that I was in transition. Long story short, if I realized how fast my last one was going I probably would have skipped the epidural. I should have had the nurse check me before I got it.
Don't even get me STARTED! Nothing ticks me off more than women who think their way is the only way. Breastfeeding, sleep training, labor, schooling...do what you want and let everyone else do the same! It's fun to discuss the pros and cons and go over our own experiences, but there's just not one right way to do things, it totally depends on who you are-- and obviously on your current situation! My oldest sister was the opposite of you. She did her first two natural, then when she got the epi with her 3rd she couldn't believe she'd never done it before.
I just think it's awesome when a woman is able to do what she wants to do. I'm so happy for my sisters and friends who have been able to have the natural births they wanted, and so happy for myself that my epidurals always worked. :)
I think that short labors make going natural way easier, you can totally do it!
I loved my sister's birth story, I'll email it to ya.
I'm a firm believer that it's the woman's choice. I personally had an epidural with all three of my babies. Although, I've got a sister in law that has had 4 babies..NATURAL. She swears by it. To each his own, really.
Epidurals vs Natural, Breastfeeding vs Bottle..really is such a charged subject. I just don't get it. I think we need to make our own decisions and keep our noses out of the business of others (especially those that choose differently than us). I saying that because I've fought with the believers and the haters alike.
All I can say is, "OUUUUUUCCCCHHHHHH"
I didn't have an epidural with my either of my first 2 deliveries (the twins was a c-section so of course there was medicine for that!) I totally made it through without the epidural and my kiddos were 9.1 and 8.4. Big kids. I think that you should try it naturally but go in knowing that an epidural is still an option. If the delivery is taking forever and your in pain the whole time than maybe an epidrual would be a good idea. Pray about it and go in with an open mind. Know that you can change your mind and get one later on. Good luck.
Well, I only have one kid so far and I know how different it can be not only from person to person, but pregnancy to pregnancy. With that in mind...I delivered completely and totally natural ie no ivs or anything (except my awesome husband and doula). This is what worked for me for several reasons 1) the fear of needles FAR outweighed the fear of pain 2) the labor moved quickly enough that I wasn't in one stage long enough for it to be too bad 3) we had taken classes to help us deal with the 'overwhelming' aspects of labor (not just how to breath, but how to focus and get from one stage to the next) 4) there were no complications during either pregnancy or delivery 5) it was something my husband was willing to help me with! I have to say the husbands role is MUCH larger when you go natural. Pete was really tired after delivery because he was right there with me through all the contractions and pushing telling me I could do it.
I must admit immediately following delivery when the nurse asked if I would do it again I didn't want to talk about it because I was exhausted, but later that day I was really bored and didn't understand why I had to stay in the hospital so long. I am planning on having the rest of my kids this way, BUT that doesn't mean I won't change my mind later. :)
Good luck and I can't wait to see your beautiful baby! I can't believe you're almost at the end.
With my first I did not want pain meds at all, I was convinced I could do it naturally - but I had to be induced and that makes the contractions worse so I went for the epidural. And then with my second, I was barely settled in my room and I was being hoked up to the epidural (didn't take the first, and the second time, and by the third try I was wondering if it was even necessary...but I had already paid for it so I was going to get it). That being said I am thinking of going natural the next time around - based on my last experience, I know that it is totally doable for me. I too believe that this is a compeletly personal decision...good luck on making yours!
I don't know why some women make such a big deal out of natural vs. not. It's SO bot a big deal to me what someone else chooses.
With Spiderman, I was induced but did not have an epidural. That is definitely NOT the way to go. I was considering going without the epidural this time, but ended up being induced (so my MIL could be there for the birth) and wasn't about to do it without an epidural again. If I hadn't been induced, I might have.
I've had back labor with each of mine. It hurts. :o) If I had been able to walk or bounce on my ball or SOMETHING the first time, I might've done better. But I was tethered to the bed.
The pushing of the baby isn't the painful part. The dilating from a 6-10 is. All the pains. The feeling like you need to push but aren't supposed to. That's also the part you need the panting for.
Basically, I'd say if you go into labor naturally, give it shot. PREPARE yourself -- classes, books, etc. Know if you want rock music or ocean music -- stuff like that. But don't rule out an epidural. Be flexible.
I know, you never hear from me, but...I did not have an epidural with Adrienne, and I recovered very quickly, and she was a very alert and lively baby. A good experience, but then had two more children, with epidurals. If you can do it, good for you, if you cannot do it, good for you. Love, and thinking of you.....
I have 5 children and delivered 2 without epidurals. People think I am totally crazy, but I would do it again. The recovery is so amazing! It is such a total high when you are done, like you just did something completely out of this world. Plus, my husband was so proud of me, it really made us closer. My only advice is....go into it knowing exactly what you want. If you haven't decided against an epidural you will probably end up getting one. Its a total mind thing. Like I said though, I've had three with an epidural and it sure was nice to not feel anything. Good luck on your decision.
My 3rd girl came with no epidural, she was too fast...my fourth kid...I chose to have an epidural and made sure I was there in time for it. That's all I'm saying. Oh, and I'll admit I'm a VERY big wimp when it comes to that pain. But its whatever YOU decide that'll be best for you. Maybe if I had been a little prepared with Emilee...I dunno. Good luck deciding.
I've heard a lot of people say what "Anonymous" said: If you haven't decided against an epidural, you will probably end up getting one.
I had epidurals with both of my babies. Like you alluded to in your post, epidurals are not all created equally. With Emma, my epidural was super heavy--I had no idea when it was time to push or even if I was pushing correctly. With Olivia, the epidural was perfect. I could feel and move my legs the whole time, and I knew it was time to push before they told me. Everything went great.
With Olivia I was induced and got the epidural before heavy contractions started. Here's what I learned from that experience: the epidural hurts a lot more when you don't have horrible contraction pains to compare it to. That was NOT fun.
For me, the epidurals were heaven sent. They didn't slow down my labors at all, which is what all my pro-natural friends warned me about (Emma's was about 15 hours and Livvy's was only 3 hours).
I have had one issue that I hated with both: I got a numb spot near my tailbone that lasted for a couple of weeks after the delivery. I wonder if that's dangerous. :/
I'm sure you'll make the right choice for you!
P.S. Just my opinion, but I think that Business of Being Born movie is ULTRA-biased. It essentially tries to convince you that if you don't have an unmedicated birth, you won't love your baby as much as you would otherwise. It REALLY bugged me. Just sayin.
I personally think that when your water breaks has a HUGE affect on the pain level. I was induced for both my 2 kids, and they broke my water early on in the labor. And about 30 minutes after, I was ready for the epidural because it gets WAY more intense and painful.
I had a friend that had light contractions, got to the hospital, found out she was dialated to an 8, and had the baby out 2 hours later, no pain meds or anything. But then again, her water didn't break until right before she was pushing.
So in my opinion, if your water doesn't break for a lot of it, it will probably be a lot easier without an epidural!
When I have kids, I choose the epidural.
I have a low pain tolerance, so I could not do it any other way.
So I already sent you an email because I didn't want to take up all your commenting space. But I have to say I agree with Kristen. Whit my first baby I got to my appointment. My doctor checked me and immediately sent me to L&D. I was already at an 8 and didn't know it. I did have an epidural with that one. I also had the serious itch, and they messed up on it so had to give me two. Never going that route again.
With my daughter, my midwife broke my water. My daughter had Intrauterine growth restriction so had to be born that day to avoid any problems. I had been dilated to a 4 for about a month. Ten minutes after my water was broken I wanted to sit down and cry. It was intense. So going off of when your water breaks probably does have a huge part to do with it.
Good luck with your decision! I pray everything goes easily for you and I can't wait to hear your birth story!
I'm gonna be talking to my midwife about this at my next appointment, but I think I'm gonna try to go natural this time. I got an epidural last time, and it wasn't a really fabulous experience. But I"m not completely opposed to wimping out and getting the drugs.
I'm not sure how true this is, but I've been told by some L&D nurses that by the time most women just can't handle it anymore and get the epidural, they would've had only about 5 minutes left of hard labor before the baby's born. Because the most painful part is usually the last bit, anyway. /shrug/ Maybe, maybe not.
I had both natural and at home, and am planning the same for this one when she comes. I loved it, not because I think pain is awesome, but to feel it and know that my body is doing what it is meant to do and the amazing feeling I got afterward when they were out on my chest. It really is a great high when you are finished and your body has released all the hormones. I felt so great after. I think you should do what works for you and that doesn't mean ruling out an epidural, just use it like a panic button and know it is there if you need it. Oh, and I don't have a high pain tolerance or anything fabulous like that. It really did hurt, but screaming and things like that can actually help you open more and release more of the hormones you need to birth! I love the human body, it is so amazing!!
Wow Erin you are one popular little girl :) I am the 49th commenter! whoot for you~
i think everyone has said everything I could say. but I will tell you that I had one epidural, and by not my choice I had the rest natural. I was allergic to the epidural, and itched horribly the whole time. it was bad enough I chose not to do it again. I have to say that out of my 7. first labor was 34 hours long, then went to 23, then 6, then 2, then 45 minutes, 24 minutes and about 2 hours for the last. the child with the epidural, was sleepy, but so was the 3 who were natural, and 3 had score cards of 6 too. My last I tried Hypno birthing, I found it to be easier, but in the end when I was going so fast, I couldn't keep control of it. Do what is right for your family girl, I know you will. hugs
Oh forgot. lol if I was to be asked if epi was better, or natural. I say epi.... :)
Amen! It is the woman's decision and hers alone. And by alone, I would even go so far as to say that her husband doesn't get a say either. If he wants to share the pain, then he can have a say, too.
(I only say that because I have an amazing husband who leaves things like that up to me)
That said, I decided to go natural on my last baby, simply because a) I had really easy labors with the epidural on my first two, and b) I wanted to say I'd done it (my pride).
It was an amazing experience, and if I were to ever have more babies, I would do it again.
I do think it was hard for my hubby to watch me be in pain, but I had a major sense of accomplishment after going through it.
Well, I say do it the way you feel.. Go take a class on natural births. I bet you could have a great experience Try it .. you can always ask for the epidural. I have to have c-sections.. So I will have drugs:)
ps im on my mom s computer and not signing her out that is why its not under my blog name
liz
I did all three of mine naturally. So I don't have a comparison of having the epidural, but I can say that while it wasn't easy, I loved it. My doctors always told me I recovered much more quickly than most women and my labors were quick. But then, I know people who didn't progress unless they got an epidural...everyone's different.
I did hypnobirthing. From what you said about the fear of pain, it might be something you'd like to look into. I LOVED it.
And yes, I agree. I've gotten so many weird comments from people that I don't usually pipe up and say I went natural. That's what was best for me and so that's what I did.
I kind of thought about the natural thing this time too. I figured I'd hold out as long as possible and maybe make it through the whole thing.
But. . . sad to say, although this was my shortest labor (9 hours) it was easily the most painful so the epidural was a welcome relief.
But I get why someone would consider the natural thing. It's kind of cool. Good luck making a decision.
This conversation is one of my faves. WHO GIVES A RATS??!... What someone else chooses. That goes both ways though. Don't go all NCB, then preach to the epi folk, vice versa... Bugs!
I BF, if you don't...oh well. Not my choice. Whatev. I love it, you don't or can't.. Who cares?
Anywho...I've had 3 epis. Each time, I push my body to the brink of unbearable pain before "caving". I will be trying again to go natural this time. I think mostly to tell my Mom I did it b/c she had 6 natural births & says I can't do it.
If I do. Great. If I don't, fine. Either way, I carried a baby for NINE MONTHS! And brought it into this world & am responsible for it forever!
I could go on & on. Lara is amazing. I've heard she is very quiet during her natural labors too. I was going to take a hypnobabies class, but I've got to move, so that's priority right now.
Good luck whatever you do! We are so close!!!
i had 2 epidurals and the 3rd naturally. i tried to back out at the last minute but it was too late, and i'm so glad.. the quick recovery is totally worth the 10-15 minutes of seriously intense pain. but once the baby is out, man.. its great.
and you dont have to worry about having noodle legs for the next 6 hours or feeling like you cant open your eyes all the way because of the epidural. i tried to go natural on my first and didnt, but would recommend it to anyone. its not easy, but definitely worth it. i'd say the recovery time was cut in half.
(and that includes tearing and stitches on the hoo-ha).
just my 2 cents.
I've only ever been induced with epidurals. But I totally COMMEND any gal who can do it naturally. I could never handle the pain. I would DIE. Okay, maybe I wouldn't die, but I would NEVER have a baby again. :) Good luck!!!
I've never not had an epidural.. so I am no help in that area. I had similar experiences as you did with both babies.. first one was scary.. second was WAY better and faster..
My friend had her first baby recently without an epidural. She had a midwife and said that she had an awesome experience. And she felt great RIGHT after the baby was born. She wasn't sick or anything.. maybe tired.. but hello.. that's normal. :)
Good luck with whatever you decide! I know you could do it!! I agree on the epidural/breastfeeding thing. It's your body, your baby. You shouldn't be judged for what decisions you make.
Loaded topic! I mean 58 plus comments??? You GO GIRL!
I just have to say, ultimately it is YOUR decision, if you want to have your baby naturally then fine. There are a TON of helps out there for natural births. MY cousin Megan is all about natural births. Everything has gone fine for her.
As for me, I HATE pain.
Can't stand it.
So I will be sticking with the epidural.
I wish the best of luck with everything...
That's it--I wish YOU the best of luck with everything...*sigh*
Silly typos.
I've had three radically different birth experiences. Epidural with Emma, natural with Becca, c-section with Claira. I would choose natural every time. With Emma, the epidural slowed down the progression of labour to the point they had to give me pitocin to start it up again, which put her into distress. It was a long process and by the time it was time to push I'd used it up and it HURT. For four hours of pushing (that could also be because she was my first though). Becca came fast and hard and not having the drugs in our mutual systems had us both alert afterwards and it was fabulous. I was able to enjoy her rather than be so exhausted I couldn't hold her (as with Emma). We left the hospital 13 hours after she was born and I would've left sooner if they'd let me.
That said, the way the baby presents, relative sizes, etc...has such a huge impact on pain levels. I always said I'd make my decision in the moment and kept my birthing plan very flexible like that. I had a friend whose baby came down wrong, into her hip, and the pain was so bad that my all natural everything friend opted for pain relief, despite having been 100% opposed to it before. Good to know the options and keep them all in mind, I think.
Before kids, I thought I would be a tough woman and go natural. Once I got pregnant, I changed my mind. I loved the epidural and had great experiences. My 2nd labor was so fast that I wonder how easy a 3rd would be without the epidural...but I don't wonder enough.
I'm late to the party, but wanted to chime in: I've given birth twice, both times without any pain meds except some Motrin after, and both times had GREAT experiences. Both were at a hospital with a regular doctor and my husband talked me through it (we took a hypnobirthing class and ditched the parts we thought were weird and kept the parts that worked for us). Of COURSE it still hurt, but I felt in control and everything went well. If you're considering going natural, I highly recommend it! It kicked my butt in a good way and it made me feel like I am capable of doing anything.
5 births, 4 no drugs, 1 w/epidural, the last one. If you do decide to go without drugs, study up on midwifery and consider having one present. They are trained to coach and aide you differently through the process and it makes a huge difference. In hindsight I'm glad I experienced giving birth with no drugs, but I wouldn't opt to do it again.
Good Luck!
I did get your email, and I'm waiting til I have more than five minutes to write you back so that it will actually sound intelligent. ;o)
My sister told me that if I didn't have a natural birth (preferably at home, with a midwife), then I wasn't a real woman. I ended up needing a c-section because the baby wouldn't fit. And you would not believe the kind of crap I get for THAT! Like my interior girth is completely my fault.
I'm getting all worked up just thinking about it so I'm gonna stop commenting...but I totally agree - it's the woman's decision and everyone else needs to BUTT OUT!
I am not qualified to comment. I had four c sections. Which apparently isn't giving birth at all. It is just allowing someone to rip life from your uterus.
(Or so I have been told)
I have three kiddos. All three were natural. I like to stand up while I am in labor and when it is over, it is over. No waiting for the drugs to wear off. You get right to healing.
Three births naturally: my advice is that you need to be educated. If you want to forgoe the drugs, make sure you have healthy coping strategies for the pain. I did the Bradley method, which focuses on relaxation, and I did just fine.
I think the level of pain experienced in labor is different for everyone, and the amount of pain you can tolerate, as well. I do well with pain that has a purpose and an end, like labor. I feel in control. Getting my teeth cleaned, however, makes me want to cry and run away.
I'm excited for you that a new little person is coming so soon. You will make the right decision for you, I know.
Ha Ha I came back to see what some of the other responses were and WOW this is a popular topic!! Very fun to read all the comments :D
Have a wonderful Sunday :D
I had my first one without a "working" epidural, as in they didnt place it right and only one leg was numb. I fought each contraction and I really dont remember much of the actual time I was in labor. But as soon as she was born, all was fine. No biggie I guess. My second I was induced so the contractions went from no pain to oh my gosh pain. I stalled for a while at 3 cm, and when I finally got the epidural I was at 10 in 45 minutes. I am due in June and plan to get another epidural, and hope that it works, but I at least know if it doesnt then I will make it through okay too. Lots of luck deciding!
I think you probably have enough opinions by now, but I thought I would add mine as well.
I have 4 children. I had epidurals for the first 3. The 3rd came so fast that it was a miracle that I actually got one. After getting to a 9 with nothing, I figured I might as well do the whole thing that way. So, I did a little research and found hypnobirthing, which I HIGHLY recommend.
I read the book, I took classes and I gave birth naturally. There is no way I would have gotten an epidural anyway, my labor was too fast. It was a totally different experience. I felt better after having that baby than after my other 3. The recovery time is SOOOO much faster. I could hardly believe it.
Also, it has benefitted me in other ways. Hypnobirthing is basically relaxation and becoming aware of your body. The techniques we were taught has helped me get rid of headaches and backaches and relax after horrible days.
I will say this: If you do decide to go natural, don't go in thinking you can just do it. Whether it is Bradly or hypnobirthing or whatever take a class. Have some tools. Because you will need them.
If you really want to try this one without the epidural, GO FOR IT!! Like so many have said, it's YOUR decision...no one else's. (plus if the pain gets to bad you can always change your mind).
I'm not extremely passionate about it one way or the other, I just knew that in my situation the chances for an emergency c-section were SO high, that having an epidural was the only way any of the OBGYN's would allow me to labor...and I ended up in a c-section anyway :o)
Spend the rest of the time thinking about it, and if you think you've made up your mind & change it...so what! Good luck girlie!!
I just had a my first baby in december and I had an epidural. I am a whimp when it comes to pain so for me an epidural was a must! I think it is totally up to the women! And I defiantely respect women who can do it without!!
I don't have strong feelings one way or the other, and I don't mind when other people have strong opinions. What I can't handle is when people treat their opinion as fact, and in turn, are horrified by my opinions. It's my body, my life, my child, so step off, lady!! (I would never actually say that, but I have walked away mid-sentence a few times.)
I had an epidural with my first, then went natural with my second. It wasn't bad, really. And I was lucky enough to feel really great afterward. I healed more quickly and didn't feel nearly as wiped out (of course, that could be due to the fact that my daughter was a fantastic sleeper).
I say go for it! And if you change your mind, no big. Either way, you get a cute little package to bring home. :)
Hi Erin, I do not know you and you do not know me. I blog hopper...I admit it. I got your blog off of my friend Anne-Marie. Anyway, I just had to throw my two bits in on this topic. I have 3 children. Had epidurals with my first two. Each was a completely different experience. My third child came all on her own. She came so quickly that I barely made it to the hospital. (I delivered her in an observation room. The nurse and my husband caught her.....literally!) So, I will tell you it was the scariest experience of my life!!!!! I've NEVER thought I was going to die more. :o) From the moment I went into labor (atleast could feel the pain) to the moment my little girl was born, was a total of 1 hour! Yep! Just an hour. Needless to say, there was no epidural for me. The pain was so intense, but literally, as soon as I had her and delivered the placenta, the pain was gone! I mean it. Gone. I stayed in the hospital for the absolute bare minimum of time and on the way home I stopped at the grocery store for a few things. It was the most crazy feeling ever. I hardly felt like I had a baby. My recovery was FANTASTIC!!!!! Would I do it again? Yep! Actually, a big fat YES!!!! However, if my labor was hours long.... then no way! No! No! No! It really is like knocking on deaths door. Atleast for me it was. Best of luck! I too feel like to each his own. :o)I don't feel anymore powerful for my one natural birth, than my other two experiences.
I wonder if you'll even get this comment, but you probably get emails when people comment, right? :)
I can't help but put in my 2 cents. In a nutshell, I had all 3 girls with epidurals and Carver without, because it was a really tight time for us financially and I didn't want to waste a couple hundred bucks on an epidural that may or may not help. (my second epidural wasn't as helpful).
The downsides - you don't know what you'll get. Carver was posterior and a horrible labor/delivery. That is probably the biggest reason it was so terrible. I could never have predicted that. I was too tired from labor ALL day to enjoy him after he was born. That was disappointing.
However, I did LOVE that I could walk around and use the bathroom right away. I love that I can say I did it, even though it involved screaming and saying "I can't do this!" multiple times. I wonder sometimes if they had a way to seal off my room to other patients. Can't be good for morale. Natural childbirth has got to be in the top 3 craziest things I've done (can't think of anything crazier at the moment, though) and among the top things I'm proud of.
A huge benefit was that NOTHING hurt for a long time. I knew a true 10 and so a little discomfort nursing was about a 1. those post labor cramps that can get bad while nursing? also about a 1. I think that's for a reason. It's a tender mercy that after all that pain, you can handle the small stuff. I thought that was pretty neat.
I chose to have an epidural on my next child, which was ridiculous because she was itty bitty and would've been a breeze compared to her big brother. But it was the uncertainty that made me scared more than the pain - not knowing has always been an issue for me.
I had great nurses when I delivered naturally that encouraged me to do it, I could tell they believed in natural childbirth. If you decide to do it, ask at the hospital for nurses that are pro-natural childbirth. I got lucky, but it seems like they might be able to send the right person your way and it'd make a big difference.
It wasn't a super-woman experience for me, but I'm glad that I experienced it both ways. I don't have strong feelings one way or the other - even after both sides. Epidurals aren't wimpy and natural childbirth isn't the only way to prove you're "tough." But sometimes you just want a different experience, with different pros and cons.
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