image found via GoogleLast night Christian and I were talking (about many different subjects, but one of them was baby names. Yes, we have narrowed it down. No, we haven't decided. And no, I'm not going to tell you. Oh, and I had contractions every six minutes for about an hour last night. It was...interesting. On my to-do list today: pack my hospital bag).
...anyway, while we were talking he casually mentioned that I am a close talker (Seinfeld episode, anyone?). I was like, "Wait. Wait... What?" He pointed out a couple of times where I have leaned in to talk to a friend's husband, and I was within a few inches of his ear, or times when I touch someone's knee gently as we are talking face to face on the couch. He told me that he loves this about me, and that he doesn't want me to change. He said I am just being affectionate.
And then I thought, "Affectionate? Is that what I am really trying to portray?" I have been aware of the fact that I touch people sometimes, but I guess I have been (perhaps blissfully?) unaware that it might make people uncomfortable.
So my question is: Are you a close talker? Do you feel uncomfortable when people get too close to you? If they do get too close, do you say something? And have I ever made you feel uncomfortable? (If so, I'm sorry!)
31 people wanted to leave a comment:
I was just trying to think if I have ever noticed this about you, and I can't say that I have.
I am not a close talker, and I do get a wee bit uncomfortable when someone is.
I most definitely like my personal space and I am not super touchy so I would say I am not a close talker. I don't think I thought you were, but then were talking about what Christian had observed I could see it in my head. It must not have been in a weird freaky way or I would have thought so then.
Also, be prepared, but with both girls I had lots of close contractions that didn't add up to much for about a week or two before they were born. Good luck!!
I'm not a close talker and I almost NEVER touch other people. I sort of don't like it about myself. Of course I do sometimes feel a little uncomfortable is someone touches my arm every time they laugh or something. It's not awkward, because I know some people are like that, but I just feel uncomfortable (uncomfortable but not awkward? whatever) I think it says something good about a person if they have a reduced "personal space". (within reason)
Had to weigh in on this one. I do like my personal space. I try not to invade others because I don't like it when mine is invaded. Like when someone comes up behind you in the grocery store line and is standing way too close? I hate that. I have noticed this about you, but never really thought about it before. Hmmm. . .
I'm not a close talker but I love it when my friends are. And you're too tall to be that much of a close talker! (at least with wee little ones like me)
I think it's a little different for a guy. In a woman, this might be endearing--or even a young man. But for a man who is approaching middle age (and looks it), this kind of thing can creep people out. And, since I teach middle school kids, I am SUPER paranoid/conscious of personal space.
I don't really notice if someone is a close talker or not. I have to say, if I know the person well, I am sure if I noticed, I wouldn't mind. If the person is an acquaintance it might be incredibly awkward.
I haven't seen that Seinfeld, but I am sure it is hysterical.
I am not a close-talker (great episode!! LOL). I have a hard time when someone is too in my space, but it just sounds harmless, warm and friendly in you! I find that I personally have to make a conscious effort to be more open & warm. Because I am shy and somewhat reserved I feel like I often come off as cold. I wish I had it in me to get a little closer. LOL.
I am not a close talker like the Seinfeld guy (ha!), but I do tend to touch people as I'm talking to them without thinking about it. I touch their arm or their shoulder periodically throughout the conversation. I even did it with the CFO of my husband's company when I got seated next to him at a banquet. We talked throughout the meal, and I touched his arm a few times as we laughed and chatted. It just happens- I don't think about doing it, I just do. Now I'm worried that I'm weird! Nobody has ever told me I've made them uncomfortable though.
I am so not... and I have a hard time with those who are... I dont want to offend.... but I try to find a way to put some distance in... lol...
by the way I tagged you...
http://www.thelifelearners.com/2010/04/life-is-good-award.html
I'm not a close talker. But I don't mind people who are. For the most part, it's people I know and it endears me to them.
I had one friend in high school who was a close talker and I know it made people uncomfortable. But not me. I dunno why.
Your pregnancy pictures look great by the way. :)
hahaha -- have you seen psych? I just watched the episode about the bounty hunter and the close-talking at the end was enough to make me laugh for days.
One other thing - as a First Grade teacher, I love the name of your blog. That series of books is the best.
Mmmmm.......well, as long as the person doesn't have dead skunk breath or they aren't of the opposite sex and creepy flirty, I don't mind close talkers at all. In fact, I feel I become better friends faster because they aren't portraying some kind of wall or distance. It's like an instant invitation to open up. I think it's great!
I am the touchiest toucher ever!
I am a complete and utter close talker. And I touch people all the time when I'm talking to them. I try to read a person to see if they back away or act shocked by the little touches. If it seems that they don't like it I back off.
I am a very physical person - A hugger and definately a toucher when I am talking.
I even know that it makes some people uncomfortable and I cannot seem to help it until after they cringe (ha ha) - It's just me.
I love this about you! You're definitely not a seinfeld-type close talker, I can't imagine anyone being offended by your level of closeness. I hadn't really noticed this specifically before, but now that I think about it, you do have a little bit more of an affectionate manner than a lot of people. What a great quality to have!
One close-talker I do remember is a friend from high school. He was willing to come just a little closer and give just a little more eye contact than most people. It was such a great quality, made you feel like he really cared when he was talking to you. All the girls loved him.
Congratulations for having a baby name conversation!!
I never noticed that you were a close talker, and I am one who needs a lot of personal space! But maybe you do just make people like me feel comfortable. :)
yay for narrowing down baby names and packing hospital bags....it's getting crazy close!
I am not a close talker, but I do touch people. I hold an arm or put my hand on someone's shoulder. But they are not man hands (Seinfeld reference again)!
I am not a close talker, and I get creeped out by close talkers! Haha!
I am fine with close talkers if they are women. Men make me a little nervous. And I can be very affectionate with people I am close to. I have no problems sitting close to a good friend, touching their arm, etc...
Baby time!! I'll say a prayer for you and your lil' one for a safe delivery. :)
I have a VERY big personal bubble and do not really like it when other people get in it. That being said, I think that I am pretty used to all of the Inman's NOT having one so it doesn't really surprise me when I get a hug or am sat next to (or on top of) by one of them. So I probably wouldn't even notice it in you. I can't really say that I have noticed it in you but then I can only think of a handful of times we have ever talked in real life. Hmmm...
So excited that the baby is getting close. Good luck with the birth and picking out a name.
When someone I don't know gets too close I find a way to back up or leave all together...I get crazy uncomfortable with people in my personal space. And I just thought about how ironic it is b/c being a nurse I am ALL UP IN my patient's personal space :o)!!!
This post was so funny! Yes, I remember that Seinfeld episode. There are also high talkers, fast talkers, and some other talkers I can't remember. As far as people invading my space, it depends who they are. If they make me uncomfortable, then I would rather them back off, but if I like them a lot, I don't mind if they get close!
Love Seinfeld!
I think with certain people I know well, I'm a close talker. Especially because I don't have a loud voice. Some people I don't mind if they're close talkers as long as I know them well and they don't have bad breath. Other than that, back off.
I've never seen you as a close talker. I do think you are very attentive. Which, I think is good!
I personally am not a close talker. I tend to prefer more space. I'm typically not one to tell people to back away..but I will try to move myself out of it.
I'm not a close talker...I don't think, maybe I should ask Ryan.
When people are super close talkers, like when I can smell their breath because their mouth is about two inches from my nose, then it bugs me. Otherwise, if it's just kinda close, it doesn't bother me.
You are too funny.
And maybe you're having a baby right now...!!!!!
i am a close talker with people that i like. :P as long as i didn't have garlic for lunch.
I'm not a close talker...at least I don't think I am. Maybe I should check with my husband and see what he thinks.
I think it's awesome that you feel comfortable enough with people to talk close. I've realized that I pretty much avoid talking to men in all situations. Not exactly sure why. Good for you that you can connect with people!
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