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Yesterday I accidentally slammed Aidan's thumb in the car door. What I didn't know is that he had locked the doors before I closed it, and while he was screaming bloody murder, I was frantically digging in my pocket for the keys to unlock it so I could open the door. I felt like the worst mother in the entire world. Fortunately (I suppose), I was at the church and a member of the ward (church congregation) was there who is an instacare physician. He looked at it and said nothing needed to be done besides putting ice on it and giving him ibuprofen. I still felt pretty awful, but he woke up this morning and said it feels much better. Whew. (The nail may or may not fall off. We shall see in the coming weeks.)
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Christian and I are watching Friday Night Lights on DVD (a friend lent us the first two seasons). The first season was AWESOME. I don't like football at all, but I still love this show. It is put together so thoughtfully. Christian and I have had great conversations based on things we have watched in this show. However, two nights ago we watched the first episode of season two, and it made me so sick to my stomach I'm not quite sure if I can go on. I think I will have to let a few days go by before I can watch more.
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Ethan started school on the 19th. But Aidan doesn't start kindergarten until Tuesday the 31st. The cute kid is so excited to start school. Every morning he runs out to the bus stop with Ethan, and waves goodbye to him as he gets on the bus. Next week he will be getting on that bus with Ethan. Sniff, sniff.
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Kaitlyn is now sleeping through the night. She usually goes to sleep around 11:00, and sleeps until about 8:00. I am very thankful for this. It is, however, difficult when she wakes up in the morning and wants to nurse RIGHT NOW, and I am trying to get Ethan's lunch made and Ethan out the door for school. I am also teaching 10 piano students right now, and I have to schedule Kaitlyn's eating times so I nurse her right before I teach and right after I teach. The schedule in our lives right now is a little rough around the edges. I am very much looking forward to Aidan starting kindergarten, and hopefully having a bit of quiet time when Kaitlyn takes her morning nap. I might even get to comment on blogs, and not just lurk!
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Did you know that Cool Mint Oreos don't have any dairy in them? Did you know that you can eat an entire package of Oreos in a day and cry a little when they are gone? Did you know that you can go to Wal-Mart to purchase Cool Mint Oreos, find out that they are gone, and curse the new college students who arrived in town last weekend for purchasing all of YOUR Cool Mint Oreos?
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One last question. Scratch that. Three last questions. At what age did you have "the talk" with your kids (if you have kids)? How old were you when your parents gave you the talk? And are there any books geared toward kids that you thought were helpful and beneficial, or in your opinion is just talking to them the most appropriate scenario?
35 people wanted to leave a comment:
I had no idea they made Cool Mint Oreos.
Personally, I think that kids should be talked to around 7-8. Not really graphic details, but start off that young. I knew a lot about sex and stuff prior to my parents ever talking to me, when I was quite young. Like 6. I learned it from TV and friends.
Book: You Were Smaller Than a Dot
by Glen Giffin
Followed by a simple question/answer discussion.
I am dreading the talks and Rick and I have already agreed that I will take care of the girls and he will take care of the boys. So guess how many I get to give so far compared to him? hmmm. I do think you should start having the talks sooner than later though because kids know WAY TOO MUCH these days and better to hear the correct things from you than who knows what from their over educated friends.
I agree with Kristina that the talks should start young. Based on how much I knew/was exposed to even at 5 or 6, I shudder to think what my kids will learn early in life.
Also, I'm so happy that your little bundle is sleeping through the night!
And, finally... I wish I lived closer to you so I could take piano lessons from you! I want to re-learn. Someday!
Cool Mint Oreos? I'm intrigued...
My mother gave me the talk the night before I got married. Yep, you read that right. I grew up learning about the birds and the bees from the nasty-minded boys at the cafeteria table adjacent to mine. Needless to say, I'm of the opinion that parents should have the talk and do it at a young age. Riley is six, and though we haven't gone into details yet, he already knows that one of the family rules is "No sex before you're married."
Good luck.
I've heard a lot of people pick 8 as "the" age for "the talk". We decided from the beginning to always be really open with our kids and answer all their questions matter-of-fact and not all weird and nervous, and we always use real names for body parts from the time they're teeny. My oldest is 6, but he's had some questions (but not "the" question yet) and I answer it honestly & age appropriate but brief and see what his reaction is, and then say "is that good?" and sometimes it's not good enough so I'll tell a little more and then ask if that's good enough at that point. So I kind of wonder if my kids will just ask questions that get them to "the" question sooner than 8...maybe. I kind of hope not because that's a lot to handle.
Friday Night Lights gets better, watch on.
I love that Mint Oreos have no dairy.
The talk. It depends on age and maturity. We had the talk with Dil at age 13, McCoy got the talk at early 12. It is a sad day...
What a fun little post! I enjoyed it.
We're going through much of the same, sans a newborn. I'm SO glad to hear she's sleeping well. Just know that there will be setbacks sometimes, and when the come, know that they'll probably only last a week or two. So nice to have a sleeping baby, isn't it?
I WILL be trying the Cool Mint Oreos in the very near future. I don't know if I should thank you for the calories they will bring.
My mom had "the talk" with me at about age 8 because of some things I'd been hearing at school. She did a great job being totally comfortable, being open for questions, and sticking with the facts. I figure the right age will be different for each kid - depending on their exposure to the info and their own curiosity. I agree with making it short and simple, age appropriate, then give them more as they get older and their questions change. That's my plan, anyway.
Hmm, I just might have to buy someone some Cool Mint Oreos before we leave for Utah on Friday... :)
My parents never gave me the talk. I seriously didn't know ALL the details until a child development class in COLLEGE. Yeah, start earlier than that! :)
We've approached "the talk" with our kids like Julie P above. Since the beginning we've always been really open, answering all questions with honesty and age appropriate depth. Because my kids know that they will get the truth from me, they feel comfortable talking to me about stuff -- about other things too. Since we have always talked without seeming embarrassed, they are much more willing to approach us. There have been many times that I was mortified with questions that my older two have asked - stuff they heard at school or from friends - and I have had to suck it up and plow through without acting shocked. The thing is, kids are exposed to so much more than we were when we were younger...
I like to start a dialouge with my kids when we are alone in the car, asking questions and really listening and hearing them.
What a fun post - lots in it.
First, OUCH on slamming the car door on your little ones finger - that really hurts and it is just one of those tragic accidents.
I have not heard of cool mint Oreo's but I definately think they need to be checked out...and soon!
I talked with my kids when they started asking me questions. I did the whole "give a short answer" routine instead of giving them the entire talk at the same time. It worked well. I didn't use books or pictures -they get enough of that later. Just a thoughtful short answer to a question and then another thoughtful short answer to another question. Sometimes the questions have years in between - they only need to know just so much at certain ages.
I was an odd duck.. i didn't have a clue till 12 when my mom talked to me. No fluff just straight up - this is how it works, using all correct terms. I threw up.. but I was so totally innocent.
I think kids need to hear parts and pieces all along on their own level, and it might vary on what age depending on the child and that situation.
There's this book called "And They Were Not Ashamed" It's about marital intimacy, but there's a section in the back that gives some good advice on how & what & when to bring the subject up with your kiddos.
Yay for sleeping babies! Boo to little fingers getting caught in the car door. I would have felt horrible too. Don't be too hard on yourself..it's not like you meant to!
I'm curious to read through the comments, for answers about "The Talk". I remember my dad talking to me when I showed a curiosity towards it all.
Haven't had the talk yet so can't help you there. I do know that you have to do it a lot earlier then you would think as that is the world we live in. It is the worst when we accidentally hurt our kids :(
Ryder goes to bed about 8, wakes up around 1:30 and then often again at 4:30, though today he made it until 6:30. He just wakes up enough to eat though, so worlds better than my other two did.
The church actually has a booklet that you can buy or download from the distribution center that has what info to talk about at what ages. We found that very helpful and have sadly used it all ready.
I had no idea they made cool mint oreos. Have you tried the mint oreo fudge cremes? Definitely my favorite.
Your thumb story made me cringe. A lot.
I don't remember how old I was when I had "the talk"... i'm pretty sure it came in stages though, according to what I was ready for. Y'know, starting with "what are these and why they're private," then a general VERY vague "what is sex" (i might have been 5 or 6?), then.... i really don't remember anything at all after that, or when/where I learned specifics. Sorry.
Corbin's ready to start sleeping through the night, I think, but we're having a disagreement about when his wake-up time should be. He thinks 7. I say 9. He might win in the end.
When I was a nanny I thought my little girl had hopped out of the car and run for the front door as usual and was shocked when I closed my door and heard her scream. Her HAND was in the door. Holy adrenaline!! (and it wasn't my own kid -- guilt!!) She ended up being just fine, but I know pretty much exactly how you felt, I think.
No oreos, or even cool mint ones over here, but I LOVE mint and chocolate so much and I am DYING to make this recipe for my birthday cake. Oh man.
Congrats on the sleeping through the night!
I got the talk when I was in kindergarten or so when my mom sat down with a few of us. I was very surprised and just wondered WHY you would do that! :) Of course it was all very matter of fact, but the thing I remember best and that served me most throughout my childhood/adolescence was when she told me what God thinks of it and what "the world" wants us to think about it (it's nasty/funny/bad/casual). Knowing how it works is fine, but I think understanding the whys and how to think about it is much more important. When I heard kids talking about it or had other experiences I just remembered that they were thinking about it in the world's way. (and she didn't talk about it being a spiritual thing or anything like that (that's weird to me), just why God gave this to married couples. Matter of fact). And the fact that babies are made that way ended up being kind of a side note, at least from when I remember. I tried to do the talk about the same with Ev and Dave when they were 6 and 8 or so.
I'm impressed that you have 10 students with a newborn. Keep up the good work! Also, it is so nice when they start sleeping through the night.
My little sister is one of those COOLege kids down there now (that's what she has as the title of her photo album on facebook for the new transition in her life). She is liking it so far.
I was 7 when my parents had the talk with me because my mom was pregnant with my brother and I had lots of questions. But this was a long time ago and I'm sure there are better books out there than the one they showed me (and I don't even remember the name).
I don't think I ever remember having "the talk" But I always knew (for the most part) what was going on. I remember being completely bored at the one day seperated classes they make the students take in 5th grade. My mom always thought if we were old enough to ask, in most cases we were old enough to know... in most cases. She might as well have told us, instead of some know-it-all kid on the play ground. But I guess that might only work with a curious child.
I love watching reruns on DVD. C and I just finished 24. Except for the most recent season, which apparently is not out yet. We are now watching Chuck. We'll have to try Friday Night Lights next.
I've had "the talk" twice with KJ. She's 8. I think 8's a good age. They're mature and curious enough, but young enough that hopefully they haven't heard too much at school yet.
My take is you need to keep "talking" over and over, and answer their questions, and stop when they need to stop.
I don't think just one "talk" is enough.
Any oreo news is good news. Yum
I was once told, if you haven't talked to your kids by the time they are 8 you won't be the one teaching them what sex is. There are great books out, age appropriate that are helpful. We had a one on one with our oldest, but late talked to the younger two together. It was a family home evening and actually, quite spiritual. I always feel closer to my kids when we discuss the things that really matter, and I can teach the way they learn it.
I agree with Jen. I have done age appropriate talks - the 5 year old gets info she can comprehend whereas the older boys have had the talk here, school and church. My oldest just started high school in 10th grade and he was shocked at what he saw!! Thankfully that lead to a discussion of being a dad at 17, do you really want to go down that road, etc. We talked while I was in the car driving and he seemed more comfortable with the no eye contact:)
Yay for sleep!!!Hope you get a few blissful months before Kaitlyn starts teething....
I'm glad Madelyn will have a friend on the bus who is in her class. I'm not sure if she'll be taking it to school, but she will ride home on it.
Mmmm. Oreos.
So I had the talk with my mom when I was 7 because my younger brother had a million questions (he was like that, still is) and so she figured if he was going to know, I should know too. I've always felt I wasn't quite ready so I've tried to wait until my kids ask. That said, Bria knows a bit, but not everything because she hasn't asked about everything. So, since she's approaching 10 I think I will be having the talk with her in the next week or so before she starts school.
I LOVE cool mint oreos. They are not allowed in my house.
I was around 7 or 8 and my mom and dad had the book "You were once smaller than a dot" (I'm pretty sure that's what it was called) and it was fine. I remember thinking that it was gross...but I am so glad it was my parents and not some nasty kids version...
I can't wait for Glee to start again!!
My mom had the talk with me when I was in kindergarten b/c I asked (and promptly told my babysitter all about it, to her horror). Then, when my older sister got pregnant @ 16 (I was 11), my mother made me tell HER where babies came from and exactly what happens...I can still remember how awkward I felt!
I just left a reaaaaally long comment on your last post. Just so you know to look for it. :)
Also, I wanted to add a little to what your mom said about preserving heirloom clothes: It turns out, according to both my chemical engineer husband and to my sister who has a Master's in book conservation, that the type of plastic that's used in Ziploc bags is inert, and won't give off any chemicals or harm clothing in any way. The only possible harm I can think of is if the item weren't completely dry when it was stored--then the bag could trap moisture and allow things to mildew.
Rubbermaid or Sterilite bins and most soft plastics DO give off acid and chemicals, and cause things to yellow or be harmed. Clear acrylic storage containers are brittle and expensive, but are inert and are probably the best for things you want to be protected from water. Otherwise, acid-free cardboard boxes are fine. Wood can leach out resins over time and also give off chemicals, and metal can rust.
Yeah, obviously I've put way too much thought into this. I have quite a lot of vintage buttons, and also some nice heirlooms clothes of my kids' (some that I purchased, some that I made).
Or you could just "lay not up treasures on earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and thieves break through and steal." :) But anyway, Ziplocs won't hurt your heirlooms.
Now I'm going crazy trying to remember what happened in Season 2 of FNL. I LOVE LOVE LOVE that show. Continue to watch it, mkay? It gets REALLY good. According to me, the shows biggest fan :)
Sorry about the thumb-slamming. Oh, the guilt!
Yay for sleeping through the night! I hear ya on the starving baby in the am though.
The talk? Ha. Don't ask me. My boys still think Jonah came out of my belly.
my verification is "cough". i don't know if i've ever had a real word.
Answer questions as they go along, point out things like the different parts on sisters and brothers. You are LDS right? I strongly believe that before a child is baptized they should have a strong understanding, of pro-creation, morals and what is acceptable (age appropriate of course). Then never stop having the discussion, we live in troubling times it is up to you to educate, education is power, this power will help them lead healthy and moral lives. It is best if it comes from you, because if you don't tell them someone else is going to.
oh yeah and totally off subject, Are you getting a make over, I am asking because I want one too, I need some inspiration...perhaps from you!
WOW! Congrats on the sleeping through the night!
I have had the talk with my kids right around 8 years old. And we do use a book - and I think it is fantastic. It is called Where Did I Come From? by Peter Mayle
http://www.amazon.com/Where-Did-Come-Peter-Mayle/dp/0818402539
It was actually how I learned too...
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